Are you TRYING to piss me off George?!?

Okay then...

Back in the day (when I was but a young boy) a man called George Lucas released a film called Star Wars. And it was good. And then he followed it up with The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. This much you know already.

Then, on the 20th anniversary of Star Wars, Mr Lucas did some tinkering with the original films. He added in some bits that had been cut out, and he re-did the special effects. I went to see them all again at the cinema. And this too was good. Nice to be able to see them in the cinema, and the new additions were fun - if a bit unnecessary.

And then, a couple of years ago, the trilogy was finally released on DVD. Legions of Star Wars fans rushed out and bought them. And then it transpired that our man George had messed with the films again! He had added in some more stuff to make them match with episodes 1 to 3 - things like getting Ian McDiarmid to play the emperor in Empire and Hayden Christiansen to be Anakin Skywalker at the end of Jedi. Collectively, the fans breathed a slightly disappointed sigh and begrudgingly accepted it.

And then - oh praise be to Mr Lucas - news broke of the DVD release of the ORIGINAL ORIGINAL ORIGINAL versions being released on DVD. The ones that everyone remembered and loved. The ones with the clunky effects, without the ridiculous fireworks at the end of Jedi, the ones where Jabba the Hutt was never in A New Hope, and the ones where Greedo doesn't shoot first (Han Solo's a bastard... yeah, get over it).

So the DVDs are now here, available to buy. And have I gone out rushing to get them so that I can enjoy the pure unadulterated versions in the comfort of my own home? Have I feck. And why not? I shall tell you.

These are two-disc editions. The first disc contains EXACTLY THE SAME SPECIAL EDITIONS THAT I ALREADY OWN. Now, this may be worth ignoring if disc two had the original film on it as promised. But that would be too simple. Disc two does indeed have the original version on, but it's in  CRAPPY LETTERBOXED WIDESCREEN and not anamorphic, and the sound is GODAWFUL DOLBY STEREO and not digital 5.1.

Mr Lucas. It is official. You've lost the plot. You money grabbing bastard. True fans will just have to wait a bit longer before he deigns to grace us with the not-screwed-about-with originals.

How can the man that brought us all so much joy give us so much pain and frustration too? Mind you, he thought Jar Jar Binks was a good idea.

Not bad I suppose...

So the Apple event is over. And what have we got?

The iPod nano is now aluminium, and available in different colours. It looks kinda like a little iPod mini. Not bad.

The iPod shuffle has been revamped - it is now INCREDIBLY tiny. I like it. It's cool.

iTunes is now on version 7.0. It seems like quite a good upgrade. The cover flow feature is nice. Good to see a proper implementation of cover artwork at last. And the iTunes Music Store is going offer whole movies, as well as music and TV programmes.

And - perhaps most significantly - there's a new piece of hardware on the way. It's currently codenamed iTV and it's like a thin client computer that plugs into your TV to display your videos and photos and play your music and podcasts.

Not bad Steve. Good effort.

So what's the go Steve?

Apple have one of their big "events" today - in fact, as I type this, it is already underway.

I'm hoping - really hoping - that they unveil something truly exciting. Their last few events have been all a bit uninspiring. Just incremental updates to existing kit, rather than anything actually new. Ooh, look - you've put Intel chips in all your computers. Ooh, look - you've increased the capacity of your iPods. Ooh, look - you've released a boom box that you can plug an iPod into. It just hasn't been very... erm... Apple.

I think they may just pull something interesting out of the bag today. Fingers crossed then... I'll be back later for an update. And hopefully, pictures of something very pretty and shiny.

Self-contained

I realise that it's not actually a gadget as such, but it is gadget-related. The time has come to get myself a man-bag.

Since ditching the grotty rucksacks of my university days, I've had a succession of bags that I've used for work over the past ten years. They've all been much of a muchness - fairly ordinary things that hold a ring binder and a few other bits and pieces, but certainly nothing special. Functional, but most of all, they've been cheap.

After reading this article I've been inspired to take the plunge into the heady world of the "proper" manbag. As the article states, they are "practical portmanteaus for money, keys, phones, papers, books and valuables, without lugging an enormous briefcase or scruffy rucksack... Men are practical beasts, laden with more gadgetry than ever, from iPods to BlackBerrys, and realise they not only need a bag for work but could use a weekend bag and perhaps even a casual bag".

Quite right too. I'm definitely in that category. I want something that looks good (dare I say it, expensive, even?) but that is practical, and just the right side of the masculine/feminine divide...

The thing is, everyone's needs are different. I don't have a PDA, I have a Filofax (it's a deliberately retro statement) but I do have an iPod, a mobile phone and a Nintendo DS. I want to be able to pop in a book and maybe even a folder from time to time, but I don't want it to be cumbersome or mis-shapen. It' got to hold my keys and a wallet too. It's a tough nut to crack.

In my search I've discovered the website eBags, and now I'm positively overwhelmed with choices. Problem is, without seeing the bag in the flesh (or, perhaps more accurately, the fabric) I'm not sure which one is right for me. I need some purchasing help...

Anyone?

Coffee coffin...

Our Sunday mornings would not be complete without the ritual long-winded making of the Americano coffee to accompany toast and Michael Parkinson.

But this morning, things did not go according to plan. The espresso machine was taking AGES to make the coffee. Not only that, but it was billowing out steam and whistling like it might just go into orbit. Worse still, after ten minutes of this aberrant behaviour, there was only about a thimbleful of sludgy looking coffee in the bottom of the little pyrex jug.

I feared there may have been some user error. Maybe not enough water in the first place? Coffee tamped too hard? Machine not assembled properly?

None of the above. After extensive scientific swap-out testing, I have come to the conclusion that it is officially shafted.

Ah well, it was nearly seven years old I suppose. But it was a wedding present, so it has some sentimental value.

But as we know, every cloud has a silver lining. This means that I can buy a new, shinier, better coffee-making gadget.

May the research begin!

Small victory

Seems like I got a more sympathetic Apple operative this time round...

I'm sorry the item you purchased didn't meet the standard of quality you have come to expect from the iTunes Music Store. Apple takes the quality of the products offered on the iTunes Music Store very seriously and will investigate the issue you reported in depth.

I have issued one replacement song credit to download the song of your choice.

Thank you Apple. Much better. Carry on.

Just take the money and run...

I was browsing through my iTunes library over the weekend, when I noticed an anomaly. One of my songs was encoded at 63kbps. Which is weird, because I've encoded all my CDs at 128kbps, and everything you buy from the iTunes Music Store is 128kbps as well. Where could this rogue file have come from?

On closer inspection, it turns out that this file is in fact a song that I bought from the iTunes Music Store. I checked the file size to see if this was just an ID3 tag error, but, sure enough, this song - which is over eight minutes long - was only 4 megabytes in size. All my other songs of similar length had file sizes over 8 megabytes.

iTunes had sold me a dud!

I sent iTunes support an email explaining the problem. And here's the very helpful reply that I received:

Thank you for contacting the iTunes Music Store.

I am sorry for the frustration that this issue has caused you.

Your request for a refund for was carefully considered; however, because your purchase is over 60 days old, my system will not allow me to refund your purchase. It also appears that this song has been removed from the iTunes Music Store. Please remember that according to our Terms of Sale, all purchases made on the iTunes Music Store are ineligible for refund. This policy matches our refund policies and provides protection for copyrighted materials.

For more information, please review the entire Terms of Sale for the iTunes Music Store at: http://www.apple.com/support/itunes/legal/policies.html

Sincerely,

Shawn
The iTunes Music Store team

So, basically what they're saying is that they admit they sold me an inferior song, and now that I want the product I originally paid for, I can go and boil my head. They have my money, and that's the end of it.

Seriously. I'm starting to have my doubts about Apple. It'd never have happened in the old days. I preferred it when I was one of a happy few, not one of the unwashed masses.

I've replied and told them this isn't good enough, and I either want a 128kbps version of the song or my money back. We'll see what happens I guess.

They could be on to something here...

I'm fairly certain that this would - after about thirty minutes - become incredibly irksome and you'd be begging to have your old, tried-and-tested desktop back again, but IT JUST LOOKS SO FRICKIN COOL!

New, new DS Lite

I took the DS Lite back to Game. I showed the shop assistant my dead pixel. Fortunately, the gods of videogame shops were smiling on me. He was sympathetic to my cause. He said he wished he had the money to buy a DS Lite, and that if it were his, he'd want it to be perfect too. He went and got me another one.

He handed it over (without even looking at the receipt or ringing it through the till) and said "Better luck with this one". I was sorely tempted to get it out of the box there and then to check for BIG NASTY DEFECTIVE ANNOYING PIXELS, but the growing queue behind me made me think otherwise.

I got the new DS Lite home, and (whilst praying to the mighty Miyamoto to spare me yet more torment) unpacked it. I pluggged in the Tetris cart, and switched it on...

Perfect. Pristine. Lovely.

My faith in gadgets has been restored. For now, at least.

Pixellation Fixation

After months of waiting, today was DS Lite day! I went and collected it at lunchtime today, but only had a brief chance to play with it. I switched it on, did the initial configuration, oohed and aahed about how pretty it was, and then put it back into its box. It was not until about 10.30pm that I got a chance to fire up a game. I bought two games - Tetris DS and Metroid Prime: Hunters. I opted to play Tetris first, so I slotted the cartridge in and prepared to play.

I had been playing for about two minutes when something in the corner of the screen caught my eye. What's that? There was a small red dot in the upper right corner of the touch screen. How odd, I thought. Maybe it's a programming glitch. I quit out of the game, and went back to the selection screen. But sure enough, there was the red dot again. Fearing the worst, I interrogated the internet. I went to Google, and with some trepidation, typed the fateful words "Nintendo DS Lite dead pixel".

It would appear that I am not the only one to have a rogue pixel on my shiny new DS Lite. Inevitably, for any device that has an LCD screen (or two in the case of the DS), there are going to be some pixel defects. The old DS was noted to have them, and not even the mighty PSP is immune. In fact, the PSP seems to have had far more complaints about it's defective pixels than the DS. Apparently it's not uncommon for the PSP screen to have five or more dead or stuck pixels.

But I digress. My beautiful new DS Lite was defective. I kept trying to convince myself that it wasn't that noticeable, and that it was only on the edge of the screen, not in the middle. Surely it wasn't that bad? But now I KNOW THAT IT'S THERE it's bugging the hell out of me. According to the internet, Nintendo are being very good about the whole issue and repairing any faulty units under warranty, but really I don't want to send my brand new handheld off for repair! I want a new one.

God I'm petulant.

Decision made

So I've spent all this time contemplating what colour of Nintendo DS Lite to get. Fortunately I got to see both of them in real life today, and at that point the decision got a lot easier.

There's no doubt that the black one is nice, but it has to be the white one for me. It looks really slick and sophisticated, and there's that crisp, clean air of Apple about it. It'll match my iPod and iMac quite nicely.

So, Friday is release day. Not sure exactly what games I'll be getting with it yet. We'll have to see what's what then. I reckon Tetris has to be a given, and as much as I hate to admit it, Nintendogs looks really good. I'm looking forward to playing the less "mainstream" games on it - and let's face it, that's what owning a Nintendo machine is all about.

Full report and "grand unveiling" photos on Friday.

Black and white

So not only have Apple released both black and white versions of their new MacBook, it looks like Nintendo have had the same idea for their DS Lite.

It's going to be released on 23rd June and will be available in the standard glossy, Apple-esque white model, and a new gloss black version as well.

So this creates the same problem that I have with the MacBook. Both colours are fabulous. SO which one should I get?

White matches the iPod, which is always good. But black is sleek and mysterious. White is clean and sophisticated, but it shows the dirt. Black is understated, but it's a bit ubiquitous.

So which is it to be?

It's... so... pretty...

Must..... buy..... new..... shiny..... thing.....

:o)

Are we nearly there yet?

"It's like a week of Christmas, but worse, because it brings only the hopes and dreams of presents to come."

It's E3 week again. Seems to have been ages since the last one (even though it has only been a year, obviously) but it's finally here. Time for the annual merry-go-round of hyperbole and oneupmanship of the Electronic Entertainment Expo.

I haven't been genuinely excited about E3 since the year they were announcing the Gameboy Advance. Since then, it has all been a bit ho hum. There have been some interesting products, but nothing that has made me sit at my computer, logged on to all the gaming websites and continually hitting refresh every two minutes.

However, this year might be different. Unlike the technical hiatus of the last few years, we're about to be treated to some hard-and-fast facts about these new next-gen machines - namely the PS3 and the Nintendo (I can still barely say it) Wii. Yes, we know stuff about them already, but not that much. Nintendo have the most secrets to divulge, and they could just steal the show if they have some truly exciting stuff. And if that happens, I'll even stop caring about the stupid name...

And Microsoft? Well, they've already shown their hand. Last Christmas in fact. Everyone knows about the Xbox 360 already. Mind you, MS won't let E3 pass without a few announcements of their own. And, almost certainly, there will be news of the one thing that may get me to buy a 360, providing the it's enough of a crowd pleaser. And what's that?

Halo 3.

You've got to be taking the wii...

I was really excited about the upcoming Nintendo Revolution console.

But now they have destroyed my enthusiasm in one fell swoop. So what could they have possibly done to ruin this apparently amazine console? I shall tell you...

They've decided to drop the name "Revolution" (this was just a working title apparently).

The official name is the Ninteno Wii. Which, when written down, looks kind of cool. Very short, snappy, graphical, has all sorts of connotations with wi-fi and iPod and similar tech-sounding gadgetry.

But when it's said out loud?

We.

Which, when spoken sounds completely identical to "wee".

I can see it now: "So what console have you got?". Answer: "I've got a wii."

Oh. My. God.

Burning a hole in my pocket?

So I've been away on my holidays over the past week, and I had promised myself that I'd buy a new gadget as a reward for all the long hours I have been doing at work. I had a Sony PSP in mind (see previous posts) but when I was in the shops, I couldn't bring myself to part with over £250 for something that only seems to have a library of "been there seen it done it" games available for it. Yeah, okay, the multimedia aspect is great, but first and foremost it's a games machine, and if there are no games that grab my attention, it'll rapidly get very boring.

After doing some extensive browsing around, I could find far more games that I wanted for the Nintendo DS than for the PSP. Problem is, the DS Lite is just around the corner, and I couldn't bring myself to buy something that would be obsolete almost as soon as I'd bought it.

This led me back to thinking about the Xbox360. A beautiful machine for sure, but the price of that thing is just astronomical. £280 for the console itself, and then £50 per game?! You've got to be kidding me. Particularly when I don't even have a high def television.

So what could I buy? I had promised myself a gadget, but I couldn't find one that I wanted. Or at least, not wanted badly enough. I even started thinking about a satnav for the car, but again, after finding out that the one I wanted was £300, I couldn't justify the expense.

After thinking about it for over a week, I've come to a decision. I'm going to buy some games for my two existing consoles (as there are some great games I've never played which are now available very cheaply) and hang fire until the DS Lite is finally released in the UK. I'm also very taken with the Nintendo Revolution, which looks like it's shaping up to be an awesome console, and may well be more deserving of a place under my telly than an Xbox360. Roll on E3 so we can all see what Nintendo have lined up.

So despite all the marketing hype and the "high definition multimedia wireless next-gen" bells and whistles, I've opted - for once - to keep my cash in my pocket and wait for the thing I actually WANT, rather than just buying what the magazines say I should have.

How's that for progressive thinking?

Oh, how we laughed. Not.

I did a huge search around the web trying to find out some more about this rumoured "PSP 1.5" - the one with dual analogue sticks - in order to ascertain if, and when, it was coming out in the UK. Try as I might, I couldn't find anything about it anywhere. Not even any posts in forums about it. Which was more than a little strange.

So I began to wonder... is this really true? Would Sony really bring out an updated PSP so soon after the original? Why is no-one else reporting the story?

And then I realised. It's April.

I went back into Smiths, and found the magazine where I'd first read the rumour (It's called 'Pure PSP' if you're interested). Sure enough, I hadn't imagined it. There was the article, complete with a photograph of the new model. But then I noticed it. At the bottom of the text, it said "turn to the bottom of page 97 for more information". So I did. And there it was...

"APRIL FOOL! There's no such thing as a Sony PSP 1.5. We made it up, and photoshopped the image."

How stupid did I feel?

But at least that makes the buying decision a little easier, knowing that there's no imminent update to the PSP in the pipeline.

Wait! There's more!

So, following on from my brief and slightly random post about the PSP/Nintendo DS Lite dilemma, I thought I'd follow it up.

Whilst flicking through magazines in Smith's the other lunchtime, I read a report that reckons a new, slightly revised Sony PSP is due out soon. It's almost identical to the existing PSP, but it has a second analogue stick on the right hand side of the unit to match the one on the left. This should make it much easier to play things like first-person shooters on the console, because you'd be able to replicate the control setup of larger consoles. I don't know whether this is true or just a wild rumour, but it would seem to be a bad time to buy a PSP right now just in case a new one really is in the pipeline.

However, the PSP has a lot going for it. There's no doubt that it's a sexy-looking gadget. Its price is a bit steep (over £200 for the Giga Pack) but it does have a host of multimedia capabilities. The idea of watching one of my DVDs on it does have a certain appeal. I've also found out that it plays AAC files, which is what I've encoded my music collection as. The games - which are obviously the important thing - are really pretty good, and I can spot at least five that I'd really like to own.

But then we come onto the DS Lite. It's not available in the UK yet - and there's no release date on the horizon - but from what I've seen of the Japanese units, it's a very desirable little console, and a huge leap forward from the slightly dodgy design of the original DS. It doesn't have the multimedia potential of the PSP (so movies and music are out of the question) but the games are intriguing. Plus the fact that it should - hopefully - only cost about £80 when it hits the UK.

So does that make things any simpler? No, not really. Neither the DS Lite or the "new" PSP have official UK release dates yet, so my plan of getting one over easter seems to have been scuppered. I could go with the ordinary PSP, but I'll be kicking myself if Sony release the new one about 6 weeks later.

This is getting a bit tricky. I can't seem to decide. Any thoughts?

Another Earth-shattering dilemma!

So then... it's a matter of great importance. It's up there with such existential old chestnuts as "Is there life after death?", "Why am I here?" and "Where do all the odd socks go?".

So the question is... Should I get a Sony PSP or a Nintendo DS Lite? Or perhaps neither?

It's got me stumped for sure. There is no easy answer. This may take some time...

Soundbridge Over Troubled Waters...

Just taken receipt this morning of my second Roku Soundbridge. I've been so impressed with the one that I bought a while back that I thought it was time to invest in another. Turns out that it's an updated model with built-in wi-fi (rather than it being an add on with a compact flash adapter) and it has its connections on the back of the unit as opposed to having them under fiddly end caps. Both are definite improvements over the original design (which was almost perfect to start with).

The other nice thing is that Roku are very good at releasing firmware updates to give the Soundbridge new features, which is a great idea. Well designed, genuinely useful, and works seamlessly. All in all, an almost perfect gadget!